Not much new today.......Linda had somewhat of an upset stomach which slowed her down....she is on her 4th "food can" as I type this....we've been having some variance in the metering of the food, so I plan on returning the device tomorrow and get a new one..don't need that problem.
Darron and LaVelle spent a quiet day, recuperating from the Alcan hiway trip....Linda was also tired but did some active things, which I'm trying to encourage.
Tomorrow is the last week of radiation...5 sessions to go.
Dave
Sunday, September 30, 2007
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Saturday Night Late....September 29th
No radiation day as it is the weekend...no hydration either......Linda actually met her goals as to water intake to replace the hydration...so that was good......she also got the 5 cans of "food" in her system...so all in all, a good day.
Brother Darron and sister in law LaVelle arrived from Alaska by motorhome (7 and a half days on the road)....now Linda will have something else to focus on...in fact she took a walk today to the mail box and back and played cards tonight until almost 10 pm!!!!! We are still giving her plenty of pain medication as well as the other various medications but she seemed to hold her own today....my hope is tomorrow goes as well and next week will be one she "cruises" through.
This walker was put together by Kurt Wagner ("Manic") as a "spoof" for my birthday at a Champ Car fan function........he spent a lot of time on it...it actually has real racing car parts as well as genuine decals....little did he know that "Linda-lou" would take a "spin" with it.....thanks again Kurt!
Dave
Friday, September 28, 2007
Friday Evening....September 28th
29th radiation session done...5 left!
Linda and her brother Marlin
Linda and her brother MarlinDave and Linda and Sadie
Today Linda completed her 29th session of radiation..with one full week left. She then did an hour and a half of hydration in the infusion center at the Clinic. Our focus still remains getting the proper hydration, pain control (medication every three hours), nausea (medication every four hours), belch control (maalox every four hours), and a number of other medications for the heart rate (unrelated to the cancer) and hormones, etc. etc..
I hope this weekend goes "eventless"....keeping active with lots of rest is the goal....and no new symptoms. Brother Darron and sister in law LaVelle are south of Portland tonight after 7 days on the Alaska/Canada Alcan Hiway...they will be a great help.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Thursday Evening...September 27th
6 days of radiation left!!!!Linda did well during the night.....I "fed" her very early this morning...and it went down the tube as she slept.
With brother Marlin and Sister in law Joni, we went to the Clinic first for a visit with the nurse practitioner......she gave Linda a "platinum star" (better than a "gold star") because it appears the burping is under control...the pain is being managed....and Linda got her 5 cans of food through the tube. I do admit I worry about things getting worse in the next few days again...I really don't want a repeat two weeks ago.
Linda then went across the street to the hospital and did her 28th day of radiation. It was then back to the Clinic for hydration....she will do hydration again tomorrow.
Linda slept a lot today....perhaps getting back some sleep she lost (I know..I know...you can't catch up). She has had two cans of food..and has started her second set of 2 cans tonight....I hope to slip in the fifth can early tomorrow.
Brother Darron and Sister in law LaVelle called tonight...they have been traveling down the hiway from Anchorage by RV and are in Everett, Washington tonight....we should see them about noon on Saturday.
The picture is Marlin and Joni with Linda...it was nice enough for Linda to sit outside.....tomorrow they leave early and the weather is supposed to drop 20 degrees and start raining....
Dave
Wednesday, September 26, 2007
Wednesday Evening....September 26th
Today Linda went in for radiation session 27...with 7 sessions left after this one.....she went in with a set of problems including the persistent burping...the upper chest pain...and then...and then..she got sick (nauseated) on the way into the radiation session...losing all the liquids she had consumed in the morning.....we figure she got "car sick"......
The solution to the nausea even though it was quick in coming on...is to practice a little prevention by taking a nausea medication each morning.
After the radiation...7 more to go!!!!!!!
We went ot meet with the medical oncologist..the nurse practitioner...Susie....the task was to first eliminate any heart trouble...re the pain in the chest.....a EKG was done as well as some blood testing..all were ok...so it was thought the pain was muscular or....., caused by the burping perhaps....
The burping will be addressed by more Maalox...it will be a matter of experimentation as no absolute answer is known....we do know the GAs X was worthless.
Linda did an hour of hydration to replace the fluids lost or not taken in. Tomorrow she will be rechecked and additional hydration will be provided.
Linda's brother Marlin and sister in law Joni came over today to spend a few days helping with Linda...it is greatly appreciated as another set of eyes is great in this situation. And the same appreciation goes to those who have helped before and others who will in the future.
Dave
The solution to the nausea even though it was quick in coming on...is to practice a little prevention by taking a nausea medication each morning.
After the radiation...7 more to go!!!!!!!
We went ot meet with the medical oncologist..the nurse practitioner...Susie....the task was to first eliminate any heart trouble...re the pain in the chest.....a EKG was done as well as some blood testing..all were ok...so it was thought the pain was muscular or....., caused by the burping perhaps....
The burping will be addressed by more Maalox...it will be a matter of experimentation as no absolute answer is known....we do know the GAs X was worthless.
Linda did an hour of hydration to replace the fluids lost or not taken in. Tomorrow she will be rechecked and additional hydration will be provided.
Linda's brother Marlin and sister in law Joni came over today to spend a few days helping with Linda...it is greatly appreciated as another set of eyes is great in this situation. And the same appreciation goes to those who have helped before and others who will in the future.
Dave
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Tuesday Evening....September 25th
8 days of radiation left after another one "knocked off" today.
Linda showed up for her 26th day of radiation...after an 8 day layoff that included 6 days in the hospital. She was stopped on the way in to have a "check up" by the nursing staff...to whom she complained about an upper chest pain...the doctor was called in...and said that Linda would need to be checked out by the medical oncologist people tomorrow. ..she also complained about the "excessive burping" which is somewhat painful....the dietitian recommended Gas X and the doctor concurred.
The radiation session then took place without incident.
With Jim and Jeff in assistance, I ran over to Eugene to complete a project for Wings I had committed to....Linda and I were scheduled to do a seminar this week at Wings but had to back off with Linda's medical condition...we were sorely disappointed....
Jim"fed" Linda by tube....we, though, backed off the last of the "food" as the Gas X doesn't seem to do the trick and Linda was feeling a bit bloated..with time this went away but we are eager to get these "side effects" out of the picture. We want the belching to go away as well as the upper pain!
More information tomorrow!
Dave
Linda showed up for her 26th day of radiation...after an 8 day layoff that included 6 days in the hospital. She was stopped on the way in to have a "check up" by the nursing staff...to whom she complained about an upper chest pain...the doctor was called in...and said that Linda would need to be checked out by the medical oncologist people tomorrow. ..she also complained about the "excessive burping" which is somewhat painful....the dietitian recommended Gas X and the doctor concurred.
The radiation session then took place without incident.
With Jim and Jeff in assistance, I ran over to Eugene to complete a project for Wings I had committed to....Linda and I were scheduled to do a seminar this week at Wings but had to back off with Linda's medical condition...we were sorely disappointed....
Jim"fed" Linda by tube....we, though, backed off the last of the "food" as the Gas X doesn't seem to do the trick and Linda was feeling a bit bloated..with time this went away but we are eager to get these "side effects" out of the picture. We want the belching to go away as well as the upper pain!
More information tomorrow!
Dave
Monday, September 24, 2007
Monday Evening..September 24th
A day out of the hospital.........
Linda is doing pretty good today. The visit to the medical oncologist got her the "green light" to restart radiation tomorrow morning...we checked in with the dietician to make sure the regimine for the tube feeding was being done correctly (it was).....Linda needs 13 hours a day to "eat"....if she drinks 32 ounces of water day in addition, she has everything covered....so she is sipping tea all day.
Linda's preference is to do the feeding during the day..so although we got a bit of a late start today, she will finish around midnight...she feels she will sleep better without having to continually getting up if she does it during the day. Son Jim is here to help with things....Son Jeff and I will be going to Eugene tomorrow for the day to set up music for the Wings couples seminar this week, Linda and I were to attend.
Linda ran into her cousin Johnny who visited her in the hospital...he is from Nebraska and he and his wife, Pat are visiting her sister who lives in Redmond...later they all came over to visit....amazing to run into him in Sisters while we were getting some more prescriptions for Linda.
Dave
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Sunday Late....September 23rd
I got bored watching the machine pump the "food" into Linda's tube..so I found some "shots" of Linda "at work" with Champ Car this season
Sunday Afternoon.....September 23rd
Linda was released from the hospital today..she has been napping most of the time since returning home....
Today I will start the home feeding on the "pump".....it requires 13 hours of feeding through the tube with the pump to get her 1,875 calories...and then there is the water on top of that...and the medications....so this is a big process. I think the only way to succeed is to involve Linda in the process as her brain is free of the morphine....she is now using a patch for the pain management.
Tomorrow we meet with the nurse practitioner...her medical oncologist also returns from his European trip.....so we hope things are back on track. The medical oncologist who has been treating Linda while she was in the hospital and while her regular oncologist was on vacation told her not to assume she will begin radiation again on Tuesday...so we have to take things a step at a time..
Linda's blood counts are back up and her pain is being managed.....if we can keep her rested and fed...we will be ahead in things.....son Jim is coming tomorrow to help out. Linda's brother Marlin and sister in law Jonie are coming later this week to help. My brother Darron and sister in law LaVelle are in their motorhome traveling down the hiway from Alaska and will spend up to a month helping out...."the Calvary is on its way!"
Dave
Today I will start the home feeding on the "pump".....it requires 13 hours of feeding through the tube with the pump to get her 1,875 calories...and then there is the water on top of that...and the medications....so this is a big process. I think the only way to succeed is to involve Linda in the process as her brain is free of the morphine....she is now using a patch for the pain management.
Tomorrow we meet with the nurse practitioner...her medical oncologist also returns from his European trip.....so we hope things are back on track. The medical oncologist who has been treating Linda while she was in the hospital and while her regular oncologist was on vacation told her not to assume she will begin radiation again on Tuesday...so we have to take things a step at a time..
Linda's blood counts are back up and her pain is being managed.....if we can keep her rested and fed...we will be ahead in things.....son Jim is coming tomorrow to help out. Linda's brother Marlin and sister in law Jonie are coming later this week to help. My brother Darron and sister in law LaVelle are in their motorhome traveling down the hiway from Alaska and will spend up to a month helping out...."the Calvary is on its way!"
Dave
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Saturday Evening....September 22nd
The drive to the end......tomorrow is the day.....
These pictures are "living proof" that Linda is doing much, much better.....two obvious signs....a smile and no tubes (except the feeding tube up the nose of course)....
The Hennessy....friends...stopped by....and delivered a prayer shawl Sallie made.....so nice of them...Linda used to make the shawls herself for the church...now she was given one...."what goes around, comes around..."
Linda had a lot of visitors today.....cousins John and Pat Taylor from Nebraska, Janine's friend Lindy and son Jeff...daughter Janine has been here most of the day helping her mom.
Enough said..the smile says it all....
What do we think things will look like? Tomorrow Linda will most likely get to go home.....her tube feeding will continue at home along with pain medications, nausea medications, etc, etc. ...for how long for the tube we don't know..most likely until she can swallow without pain....Monday we will most likely go back to the Clinic and test the blood and everything and get the signal to continue with the radiation.....then on Tuesday back in for the 26th day of radiation in the hospital radiation center...Linda also will have a visit to her new primary physician in the branch clinic on the other side of town to recheck her hormones and heart medications on Tuesday......Wednesday radiation session 27.......son Jim will be coming in Monday and Tuesday to help.
Dave
Saturday Morning.....September 22, 2007
Good day today........
1. Linda is no longer neutropenic....
2. Linda is off the morphine....they have a patch on her...a fentanyl patch...we shall see if she can do it without nausea....
3. Linda is off the IV's....
4. Linda is being weaned off the Oxgen.....
5. Linda's vitals are normal....
6. Linda goes home tomorrow!!!!!!
Linda walked with Janine's help this morning with a walker. She is sitting up drinking tea....and taking some medications by mouth....she is encouraged to drink water today...so the tea works. So good news....hopefully a visit to the clinic on Monday with Suzie and then back for the last of the radiation starting Tuesday....
Dave
1. Linda is no longer neutropenic....
2. Linda is off the morphine....they have a patch on her...a fentanyl patch...we shall see if she can do it without nausea....
3. Linda is off the IV's....
4. Linda is being weaned off the Oxgen.....
5. Linda's vitals are normal....
6. Linda goes home tomorrow!!!!!!
Linda walked with Janine's help this morning with a walker. She is sitting up drinking tea....and taking some medications by mouth....she is encouraged to drink water today...so the tea works. So good news....hopefully a visit to the clinic on Monday with Suzie and then back for the last of the radiation starting Tuesday....
Dave
Friday, September 21, 2007
Friday Evening...September 21st
Linda out for her second walk of the day....with Janine....the walk is set to prevent pneumonia and blood clots. Linda made the whole circuit around the ward each time...they were impressed.The feeding tube was put in late this afternoon...so the "feeding frenzie" began....Janine and Pastor Paul got to watch the "live x-ray" display which guides the insertion of the tube.
How good is Linda feeling?...we asked her what she needed...she said: "wild sex!".....her humor is returning! Where the pain was a 10 (or more)..it is now a 2 or a 3 for the most part.....this is great! Linda is getting food, pain relief, sleep and a good attitude...good signs.
Dave
ps....I forgot to mention that Suzie, the nurse practitioner from the Clinic , who has overseen Linda's journey, came all the way over today to visit and check on Linda...and this is a very busy lady! We were very impressed and greatful for her commitment to Linda. Thank you.....so much.
Friday Morning......September 21st
Day 4 in the hospital......
I got the call from Linda's doctor early again today.....he said her blood counts were improving and that she had torn her feeding tube out...and she wasn't going anywhere today (meaning checking out of the hospital).... I rushed down there as fast as I could....
No one really has the story..but it appears Linda got up about 10 pm in her morphine and ambien state, perhaps to use the bathroom on her own.....it appears she tripped....or...or....anyway the feeding tube was pulled out...and the commode was busted. The good news is it didn't hurt her and she doesn't quite have full story herself. They said she was standing in the hall with the tube in her hand!
Now they will be scheduling a time to put the tube back in...which involves a trip to xray on the first floor and the long process of insertion.....the bad news is it appears she got very little of her "meal" last night.
Today we took a walk around the ward....Linda in her mask (to avoid germs), holding onto the back of the wheel chair, and the nurse steadying her and I rolling the meds attached to her. The lady did the entire loop! Now with a little rest, she is going to take a shower and get ready for Janine's arrival.
Her pain level seems better....
Dave
I got the call from Linda's doctor early again today.....he said her blood counts were improving and that she had torn her feeding tube out...and she wasn't going anywhere today (meaning checking out of the hospital).... I rushed down there as fast as I could....
No one really has the story..but it appears Linda got up about 10 pm in her morphine and ambien state, perhaps to use the bathroom on her own.....it appears she tripped....or...or....anyway the feeding tube was pulled out...and the commode was busted. The good news is it didn't hurt her and she doesn't quite have full story herself. They said she was standing in the hall with the tube in her hand!
Now they will be scheduling a time to put the tube back in...which involves a trip to xray on the first floor and the long process of insertion.....the bad news is it appears she got very little of her "meal" last night.
Today we took a walk around the ward....Linda in her mask (to avoid germs), holding onto the back of the wheel chair, and the nurse steadying her and I rolling the meds attached to her. The lady did the entire loop! Now with a little rest, she is going to take a shower and get ready for Janine's arrival.
Her pain level seems better....
Dave
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Thursday Evening...September 20th
This is the view from Linda's room...great evening in Bend, Oregon.....temperature at nights now just hovering above freezing.....clear and cold.AND THEN.....Linda woke up and slurred...."luke at thee Son Set" (translation: "look at the sunset")...and in the few minutes between the above picture and the below picture.....
I think Linda is doing better.....we won't know about the blood till morning....but her general condition (excusing the morphine fog) seems to be better..she still has pain but with the 2,250 calories she is getting a day and the sleep.......she just seems better. We've been using a lot of humor around her and she seems to respond to it.....
Tomorrow daughter Janine comes for three days....Son Jeff visited today and will be back tomorrow before he works. Linda was able to read the blog comments again today...I keep telling everyone these comments are the best thing going..she loves them!
Pastor Paul is coming tomorrow....Linda is very excited about that...he is a very dear man.
Dave
Thursday Afternoon....September 20th
With Linda's hospitization, she has to be up for a period of time to prevent pneumonia, etc. etc.. The good news is she got a shower too! (it was a bit complicated with the tubes and all...but it worked). We took a few trips in the wheelchair around the ward asking people the way to Costco because we wanted some pizza. We also told the nurses we were scouting for a better room...even though all thought we had the best view of the mountains.....I just saw the "PLAN" on the board for Linda: morphine for pain control.....tube feeding 6 pm until 7 am.....chair 3 times per day. The "GOAL" is to have her "Eat Again! for Strength"
Dave
Thursday Morning....September 20th
Things are pretty much the same..blood counts are still down....the doctor called at 7 am this morning to report in....he said they would continue on the same program ......pain control....antibiotics...blood component boosters...
Linda remains very "in and out"....more than "loopy" today....."loopy lou" is more like it.....it's the morphine being used for the pain control. Linda's RN, Eric, was in my candidate class when I was the candidate ski patrol trainer on the National Ski Patrol at Mt. Bachelor.
Dave
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Wednesday Evening....September 19th
"Loopy Linda"......"in and out"..."in and out"..."in and out"...so goes the day for Linda...
The pain is still intense but it is managed with the baseline flow and the pump.....Linda is "eating" right now..it is a process that will take all night.....
Linda's "vitals" are good and stable....
The last transfusion is in process....
Tomorrow is another day....My hopes are for a stronger (dietary, painless, rested and good attitude) day for Linda...maybe even a bit less "loopy.
Dave
ps...Sadie says"hi"...her special food costs $1.60 per day..her medication is $5.00 per day...she is facing a surgery that was $1,100 last time ..more like $1,300 this time.....anybody want to "rent"a very loving dog from us for a few months?
The pain is still intense but it is managed with the baseline flow and the pump.....Linda is "eating" right now..it is a process that will take all night.....
Linda's "vitals" are good and stable....
The last transfusion is in process....
Tomorrow is another day....My hopes are for a stronger (dietary, painless, rested and good attitude) day for Linda...maybe even a bit less "loopy.
Dave
ps...Sadie says"hi"...her special food costs $1.60 per day..her medication is $5.00 per day...she is facing a surgery that was $1,100 last time ..more like $1,300 this time.....anybody want to "rent"a very loving dog from us for a few months?
Wednesday Afternoon....September 19th
"Loopy Linda" is trying to sleep..what a noisy place....she gets "cat naps" and then there is a noise..and then....
Linda is having the blood transfusions going in now..two pints... her fever has reduced and her pulse went back down to normal.
"Mr. Caregiver" (Me) is still working ......I gave Linda a great footrub with a payback if I ever get in the same situation....I also help her when she needs to go to the bathroom....doesn't sound complicated, but with multiple tubes into both arms, oxygen, etc. etc., it is a project.
Jeff is coming at 4 pm so I can go do some tasks, get Sadie, and come back for the evening. Janine is coming Friday morning....
I forgot to mention, I now have a heart murmur ....diagnosed yesterday at my followup for the high blood pressure..so tomorrow I have a test done to see the extent...the Doc said "So..how long have you had this heart murmur"..to which I said: "WHAT????????".....it's a B**** getting old! Enjoy your health while you have it!
Dave
Linda is having the blood transfusions going in now..two pints... her fever has reduced and her pulse went back down to normal.
"Mr. Caregiver" (Me) is still working ......I gave Linda a great footrub with a payback if I ever get in the same situation....I also help her when she needs to go to the bathroom....doesn't sound complicated, but with multiple tubes into both arms, oxygen, etc. etc., it is a project.
Jeff is coming at 4 pm so I can go do some tasks, get Sadie, and come back for the evening. Janine is coming Friday morning....
I forgot to mention, I now have a heart murmur ....diagnosed yesterday at my followup for the high blood pressure..so tomorrow I have a test done to see the extent...the Doc said "So..how long have you had this heart murmur"..to which I said: "WHAT????????".....it's a B**** getting old! Enjoy your health while you have it!
Dave
Wednesday Morning...September 19th
"Loopy Linda".......
Day 2 in the hospital..........
Linda is "kinda loopy"...they increased the baseline morphine during the night as well as increased the "push to pass" (only Champ Car fans will understand this inside joke)...basically if Linda still has pain she can gain more morphine by pushing a button...she is allowed more every six minutes...and the machine calculates the amount of pushes she makes which gives them information on her pain level, etc.......the morphine has her a bit "drugged up", hence "loopy".
Please remember "pain management" is the primary reason she is here in the hospital.
Linda has a slight fever this morning....and they are treating her for that....I am grateful once again she is here in the hospital as that would have been another worry at home.
Linda is being "fed" (though the tube) from six pm and then all night..so we are on course with that objective too.
Linda didn't sleep well.....I met with the nurse supervisor this am and they are going to get Linda a sleep aid for tonight...they are going to "mirror" what we have been doing at home which has worked...hospitals are a bit noisy and she sleeps for 5 minutes and then a noise wakes her up (plenty of those) or the pain wakes her up (which is why they increased the baseline morphine).
They have WIFI in the hospital so look for plenty of information as I have "time on my hands".
The folks at the Vet clinic took Sadie for the day and will work on her issues...we are putting off surgery for the bladder stones until Linda is better and the stones "may" disappear with the diet and the medications she is on.....they are going to groom her today also..as we missed our appointment because of Linda...
Sadie looked and looked for Linda last night...she was a bit puzzled why she wasn't there..she has sensed a problem with Linda and has stayed very close to her ...like "protective".....
Anyway, enough of this..I think daughter Janine comes in tonight for 4 days..Jim had to go home last night because of work today..he will be back Monday....and I know others are in the loop for coming....We'll probably see Jeff today as it is his day off.
Thanks to all for their support...thoughts and prayers.....yesterday during admittance, Linda "ran" into Pastor Paul who used to be the pastor in the church Linda attended....both of us think so much of him and he will be stopping by..this is a real bonus...running into him was "synchronystic"....ie, "meant to be".
Dave
Day 2 in the hospital..........
Linda is "kinda loopy"...they increased the baseline morphine during the night as well as increased the "push to pass" (only Champ Car fans will understand this inside joke)...basically if Linda still has pain she can gain more morphine by pushing a button...she is allowed more every six minutes...and the machine calculates the amount of pushes she makes which gives them information on her pain level, etc.......the morphine has her a bit "drugged up", hence "loopy".
Please remember "pain management" is the primary reason she is here in the hospital.
Linda has a slight fever this morning....and they are treating her for that....I am grateful once again she is here in the hospital as that would have been another worry at home.
Linda is being "fed" (though the tube) from six pm and then all night..so we are on course with that objective too.
Linda didn't sleep well.....I met with the nurse supervisor this am and they are going to get Linda a sleep aid for tonight...they are going to "mirror" what we have been doing at home which has worked...hospitals are a bit noisy and she sleeps for 5 minutes and then a noise wakes her up (plenty of those) or the pain wakes her up (which is why they increased the baseline morphine).
They have WIFI in the hospital so look for plenty of information as I have "time on my hands".
The folks at the Vet clinic took Sadie for the day and will work on her issues...we are putting off surgery for the bladder stones until Linda is better and the stones "may" disappear with the diet and the medications she is on.....they are going to groom her today also..as we missed our appointment because of Linda...
Sadie looked and looked for Linda last night...she was a bit puzzled why she wasn't there..she has sensed a problem with Linda and has stayed very close to her ...like "protective".....
Anyway, enough of this..I think daughter Janine comes in tonight for 4 days..Jim had to go home last night because of work today..he will be back Monday....and I know others are in the loop for coming....We'll probably see Jeff today as it is his day off.
Thanks to all for their support...thoughts and prayers.....yesterday during admittance, Linda "ran" into Pastor Paul who used to be the pastor in the church Linda attended....both of us think so much of him and he will be stopping by..this is a real bonus...running into him was "synchronystic"....ie, "meant to be".
Dave
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Tuesday..very Late...September 18th
Linda was hospitalized today..and that is a good thing.....she was losing the fight with the pain...no way to get on top of it. Also the feeding had not been set up properly for us...and the right system was finally put into place...but in the hospital she can get the right formulas to gain the strength she needs.
Linda is extremely neutropenic..which is to be expected..in the hospital she can receive the medications she need to fight off any infections as well as blood transfusions, etc. etc. she cannot receive any flowers or ice.....(who sends ice these days?). Visitors have to wash their hands before entering and cannot be sick in any way..we don't even want her touched.....
Sons Jim and Jeff were with her in the hospital.....Jim had been helping out at home and also saw what an enormous task was at hand.
The doctor said she has really been affected by the chemo and radiation in her chest...and he is treating her now for many possible possibilities....they are using a pain pump to manage the pain.....
Anyway, I'm tired..very tired..this is about what I can summarize for tonight.
Dave
Linda is extremely neutropenic..which is to be expected..in the hospital she can receive the medications she need to fight off any infections as well as blood transfusions, etc. etc. she cannot receive any flowers or ice.....(who sends ice these days?). Visitors have to wash their hands before entering and cannot be sick in any way..we don't even want her touched.....
Sons Jim and Jeff were with her in the hospital.....Jim had been helping out at home and also saw what an enormous task was at hand.
The doctor said she has really been affected by the chemo and radiation in her chest...and he is treating her now for many possible possibilities....they are using a pain pump to manage the pain.....
Anyway, I'm tired..very tired..this is about what I can summarize for tonight.
Dave
Monday, September 17, 2007
Monday Late...September 17th
Where do I start......
Today was a day that out did any other day.....
Linda went to the medical oncologist nurse practitioner...who immediately canceled the 26th session of radiation...and put her into hydration for 3 hours (a first).....She also reviewed the medicine changes as a result of the emergency room visit yesterday and added a couple to reinforce things and further deal with the pain.
After the hydration which included 8 mgms of morphine......Linda seemed to settle down a bit...we then went over to the radiation to remap the area for radiation....they did so (remember the remapping is to protect the spinal cord) and then informed Linda radiation was off until a week from Tuesday (8 weekdays)...and that they had computed that she needed 34 total days instead of 35 (which we had known was a possibility)..she then finishes in three weeks..just before the week of the wedding in Mexico. (more on that later).
Linda then went to get her tube put in for feeding..they use an xray machine that shows the whole thing..and I got to watch.....as the tube went up the nose..down the throat...and into the stomach...it was supposed to go into the small intestine but refused. So we had to quit and go over to the diet feeding place where they showed me how food is put into a big "hypodermic device and then linked up with the tube and food, medicine, etc is pushed into the tube and down into her digestive system. Then we went back and with one more effort, the doctor was able to properly place the device.
We then headed home by way of the pharmacy to get more medications...we got home and I immediately started to feed her..we use ENSURE...and it will take a minimum of 5 cans a day...and on Wednesday we meet with a dietitian to further figure out the feeding course. Son Jim showed from West Linn to help for a couple of days...Son Jeff is coming Wednesday and Thursday..and there are more coming...I have realized I cannot do this all by myself..I am worn out.
Anyway, we fed her..got the medications in her and set her up for bed....with one more moment of excitement..her pulse was way too high..I checked with the doctor on duty and he had us increase her heart rate medication....and put her to bed...I monitored her several times...she seemed to settle down and was sound asleep..please remember she didn't get nap time today because of all the stuff going on..hence her acting a bit wiped out.
Jim and I then prepared dinner and sat down to eat...AND THEN..we heard a noise upstairs in the bedroom....I rushed up there and thought I would see that Linda had fallen out of bed..or..or...
Nope, she was weighing herself.....really!
We put her back to bed with a stern warning.....
Tomorrow it's back in for more hydration....and another examination by the nurse practitioner...I could tell looking in her eyes today that she was close to tears...she said over and over that Linda was not one to complain and that she was in a lot of pain before she said anything....Linda means a lot to these committed people..all were very concerned about her again today.
This is about what I remember..again, I am wiped out...I don't want too many more days like this one or a couple of days like the ones we just went through.
Dave
ps...Linda got up one more time..she needed more pain medication which I "expertly" (after one previous try) administered using the feeding tube...hopefully we will not see her again tonight.
Today was a day that out did any other day.....
Linda went to the medical oncologist nurse practitioner...who immediately canceled the 26th session of radiation...and put her into hydration for 3 hours (a first).....She also reviewed the medicine changes as a result of the emergency room visit yesterday and added a couple to reinforce things and further deal with the pain.
After the hydration which included 8 mgms of morphine......Linda seemed to settle down a bit...we then went over to the radiation to remap the area for radiation....they did so (remember the remapping is to protect the spinal cord) and then informed Linda radiation was off until a week from Tuesday (8 weekdays)...and that they had computed that she needed 34 total days instead of 35 (which we had known was a possibility)..she then finishes in three weeks..just before the week of the wedding in Mexico. (more on that later).
Linda then went to get her tube put in for feeding..they use an xray machine that shows the whole thing..and I got to watch.....as the tube went up the nose..down the throat...and into the stomach...it was supposed to go into the small intestine but refused. So we had to quit and go over to the diet feeding place where they showed me how food is put into a big "hypodermic device and then linked up with the tube and food, medicine, etc is pushed into the tube and down into her digestive system. Then we went back and with one more effort, the doctor was able to properly place the device.
We then headed home by way of the pharmacy to get more medications...we got home and I immediately started to feed her..we use ENSURE...and it will take a minimum of 5 cans a day...and on Wednesday we meet with a dietitian to further figure out the feeding course. Son Jim showed from West Linn to help for a couple of days...Son Jeff is coming Wednesday and Thursday..and there are more coming...I have realized I cannot do this all by myself..I am worn out.
Anyway, we fed her..got the medications in her and set her up for bed....with one more moment of excitement..her pulse was way too high..I checked with the doctor on duty and he had us increase her heart rate medication....and put her to bed...I monitored her several times...she seemed to settle down and was sound asleep..please remember she didn't get nap time today because of all the stuff going on..hence her acting a bit wiped out.
Jim and I then prepared dinner and sat down to eat...AND THEN..we heard a noise upstairs in the bedroom....I rushed up there and thought I would see that Linda had fallen out of bed..or..or...
Nope, she was weighing herself.....really!
We put her back to bed with a stern warning.....
Tomorrow it's back in for more hydration....and another examination by the nurse practitioner...I could tell looking in her eyes today that she was close to tears...she said over and over that Linda was not one to complain and that she was in a lot of pain before she said anything....Linda means a lot to these committed people..all were very concerned about her again today.
This is about what I remember..again, I am wiped out...I don't want too many more days like this one or a couple of days like the ones we just went through.
Dave
ps...Linda got up one more time..she needed more pain medication which I "expertly" (after one previous try) administered using the feeding tube...hopefully we will not see her again tonight.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Sunday Late...September 16th
Tough day today.....
Today started with Linda being up very very early with consistent pain...in the esophagus area....they use a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 the worst..she described her pain as a 10....the first time this has happened...she thought pills she had taken during the night has stuck in her throat...
The physician in the clinic we were to call after hours directed her to hospital emergency immediately.....
When we got there, the pain was persisting.....
To make a long and painful story short, there was no blockage or anything stuck in the esophagus.....rather, it was the cumulative pain as a result of the radiation, lack of sleep (two bad nights in a row), and a less than adequate diet (it has been a real struggle to eat).....they were actually afraid of a cardiac arrest initially but an EKG calmed those fears...
They gave Linda morphine and the pain shot right through that..they gave her a patch of a narcotic I don't remember the name....and the pain continued..more morphine...and ativan..and...and Linda's pain started to calm down......but still waves of "8's".....
The doctor prescribed new medications...to deal with the pain.
He was very clear in that the pain must be managed.....the diet must be manged...and the sleep must be managed.....it was clear to us that if the pain is manged, the other two will follow. .....particularly when and if a feeding tube is put in.
Anyway, a lot more happened but this is the essence of it....the doctor said Linda was in the worst part of the radiation.....and it is true...I am very afraid about Linda's will to continue if this pain cannot be better managed....at times today she was ready to give up.
Tomorrow we meet with the medical oncologist (actually the nurse practitioner)..we hope to get on top of this...it was a bad, bad weekend....and there are two weeks of radiation left......Linda also gets remapped tomorrow in radiation.
Dave
Today started with Linda being up very very early with consistent pain...in the esophagus area....they use a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 the worst..she described her pain as a 10....the first time this has happened...she thought pills she had taken during the night has stuck in her throat...
The physician in the clinic we were to call after hours directed her to hospital emergency immediately.....
When we got there, the pain was persisting.....
To make a long and painful story short, there was no blockage or anything stuck in the esophagus.....rather, it was the cumulative pain as a result of the radiation, lack of sleep (two bad nights in a row), and a less than adequate diet (it has been a real struggle to eat).....they were actually afraid of a cardiac arrest initially but an EKG calmed those fears...
They gave Linda morphine and the pain shot right through that..they gave her a patch of a narcotic I don't remember the name....and the pain continued..more morphine...and ativan..and...and Linda's pain started to calm down......but still waves of "8's".....
The doctor prescribed new medications...to deal with the pain.
He was very clear in that the pain must be managed.....the diet must be manged...and the sleep must be managed.....it was clear to us that if the pain is manged, the other two will follow. .....particularly when and if a feeding tube is put in.
Anyway, a lot more happened but this is the essence of it....the doctor said Linda was in the worst part of the radiation.....and it is true...I am very afraid about Linda's will to continue if this pain cannot be better managed....at times today she was ready to give up.
Tomorrow we meet with the medical oncologist (actually the nurse practitioner)..we hope to get on top of this...it was a bad, bad weekend....and there are two weeks of radiation left......Linda also gets remapped tomorrow in radiation.
Dave
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Saturday Evening.....September 15th
Not an easy day.....
Today we tried to use the maximum amount of pain medication on a prescribed schedule along with the magic mouthwash and link food intake in with the schedule....
The net effect is that the pain medication just doesn't do the job....even when taken in the maximum schedule and amounts suggested.....
And there just isn't enough food intake for the effort....not that Linda hasn't been trying......
She wants the feeding tube.....
So Monday I believe we will find out the time for the insertion of the tube..as we were told Friday it was being put on a schedule......
The good news is that Linda walked to the mail box....sloooowwww but determined (with a bottle of Ensure in her hand).
Today we tried to use the maximum amount of pain medication on a prescribed schedule along with the magic mouthwash and link food intake in with the schedule....
The net effect is that the pain medication just doesn't do the job....even when taken in the maximum schedule and amounts suggested.....
And there just isn't enough food intake for the effort....not that Linda hasn't been trying......
She wants the feeding tube.....
So Monday I believe we will find out the time for the insertion of the tube..as we were told Friday it was being put on a schedule......
The good news is that Linda walked to the mail box....sloooowwww but determined (with a bottle of Ensure in her hand).
Dave
ps...we have a Monday 8:20 meeting with the nurse practitioner to do the regular blood tests as well as discuss where things are at..most likely we will find out about the tube implant at that time...we also had a message on our machine telling us that the 9:15 radiation session will be changed to 12:45 monday to recheck all the calibrations, etc.. Our expectation is that this is the time things will be recalculated for a differerant angle of approach as the radiation oncologist warned us that after day 26 the beam had to be changed because the spinal cord cannot be included anymore......
Friday, September 14, 2007
Friday Evening.....September 14th
Day 25 of radiation..10 to go (maximum).
Today Linda did her 25th day of radiation and then went over to the clinic for another hydration infusion. She has lost 2 pounds..the first indication of an actual weight loss. We had an extensive discussion with the nurse practitioner.....first, we learned again that Linda is a model patient....at the tops in terms of how she is progressing through this very aggressive regimen. It is not unusual for patients to have lost 10 pounds or more at this point in their treatment. and, having said that, Linda needs to keep her nourishment going....the esophagitis has about consumed her..physically and emotionally. ...it is extremely painful for her to eat anything.....her method of eating and drinking is to take nourishment into her mouth...warm it...and then let it slowly "leak" down her throat....not enough...and painful.
In discussion with the nurse practitioner, it appears the viable solution is a feeding tube.....particularly when there is a wedding for Linda to attend at the end of this treatment schedule and the desire to have her healthy (in other words, letting her heath decrease and then built back up after the treatment is not an option). The nurse practitioner is scheduling the insertion of the tube....but we have yet to hear back as to when and other details.
In the meantime, we will be "upping" the pain medication, hoping to achieve a level of pain relief that will be constant....and then using more of the "magic mouthwash" to desensitize the esophagus so Linda can get nourishment down in a greater amount at a "sitting".
This is about the simplest way to describe the session...Linda did receive hydration again which helps stabilize her...she is an emotional rollercoaster....she is in a lot of pain.
Words of encouragement are greatly appreciated.....a call distracts Linda from her misery....the BLOG comments are carefully read.....a visit invaluable....these are tough times for her right now.
Dave
Today Linda did her 25th day of radiation and then went over to the clinic for another hydration infusion. She has lost 2 pounds..the first indication of an actual weight loss. We had an extensive discussion with the nurse practitioner.....first, we learned again that Linda is a model patient....at the tops in terms of how she is progressing through this very aggressive regimen. It is not unusual for patients to have lost 10 pounds or more at this point in their treatment. and, having said that, Linda needs to keep her nourishment going....the esophagitis has about consumed her..physically and emotionally. ...it is extremely painful for her to eat anything.....her method of eating and drinking is to take nourishment into her mouth...warm it...and then let it slowly "leak" down her throat....not enough...and painful.
In discussion with the nurse practitioner, it appears the viable solution is a feeding tube.....particularly when there is a wedding for Linda to attend at the end of this treatment schedule and the desire to have her healthy (in other words, letting her heath decrease and then built back up after the treatment is not an option). The nurse practitioner is scheduling the insertion of the tube....but we have yet to hear back as to when and other details.
In the meantime, we will be "upping" the pain medication, hoping to achieve a level of pain relief that will be constant....and then using more of the "magic mouthwash" to desensitize the esophagus so Linda can get nourishment down in a greater amount at a "sitting".
This is about the simplest way to describe the session...Linda did receive hydration again which helps stabilize her...she is an emotional rollercoaster....she is in a lot of pain.
Words of encouragement are greatly appreciated.....a call distracts Linda from her misery....the BLOG comments are carefully read.....a visit invaluable....these are tough times for her right now.
Dave
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Thursday Late....September 13th
Mrs. Wood at her "worst"....oops I mean "best"...tough day but she persevered....and she has been sipping drinks and soup continuously since she got home...except for the nap times. At her rate of "sipping" it's going to be tough to get the amount of calories and liquid volume needed per day. But she has to sip because of the esophagitis.
Below is an artists print (AP) by Nancy Arlington's daughter, Viza, for Linda....it is a wonderful reminder of Linda's belief..that is to BELIEVE.
The other "lady" of the house, Sadie..is having health problems of her own. Last year she developed bladder stones, brought on by a bacterial infection...this required surgery to remove the stones. Well, the problem has returned and the vet is trying diet and antibiotics to cure the problem...another surgery might be required as she has 4 new stones...we will know soon.Is Sadie a dependent and thereby on my health insurance? (Unfortunately..I think not).
Dave
Thursday Afternoon...September 13th
A day that started in the toilet......Day 24 of radiation
Linda awoke , physically and mentally "in the toilet".....she was still nauseated and emotionally spent.
The nurses in radiology took a look at her and were also concerned..they offered some suggestions on the nausea and though perhaps if Linda looked like this tomorrow she should go back and get some more hydration. Once radiation was over, Linda had a dermatology appointment but they were already running way behind at 9:30...Linda was in bad shape so we said "screw that" and left...there are more priorities than waiting an hour for a dermatology appointment (particularly when they've blown it already twice for a skin condition problem).
I then drove her over to the infusion clinic to get some help on the situation (nausea, etc. etc.). The nurse practitioner took a look at Linda and sent her into the infusion room..in the bed....and started infusion of nausea medications and hydration. They also did a blood analysis for blood cell counts and electrolytes....to sum it up, the red blood cell counts are down so the booster has yet to "kick in"...the electrolytes are OK.....this is why she is not having much in the "gas tank"......the nausea is being caused by the "cumulative effect" of the chemo and also most likely by the pain medication for the esophagitis.
Tomorrow after radiation (day 25), we go back for more hydration, etc. My mind is a bit more at ease as I felt a bit hopeless over one night..having to look at a whole weekend of possible trouble was something I was really concerned about.
Linda is in much better shape as I write this....the esophagitis still hurts..it still is painful to eat..but physically...and mentally, she is in much better shape...not the best but better. Having to physically and mentally endure all this treatment is taking it's toll.
More later.
Dave
Linda awoke , physically and mentally "in the toilet".....she was still nauseated and emotionally spent.
The nurses in radiology took a look at her and were also concerned..they offered some suggestions on the nausea and though perhaps if Linda looked like this tomorrow she should go back and get some more hydration. Once radiation was over, Linda had a dermatology appointment but they were already running way behind at 9:30...Linda was in bad shape so we said "screw that" and left...there are more priorities than waiting an hour for a dermatology appointment (particularly when they've blown it already twice for a skin condition problem).
I then drove her over to the infusion clinic to get some help on the situation (nausea, etc. etc.). The nurse practitioner took a look at Linda and sent her into the infusion room..in the bed....and started infusion of nausea medications and hydration. They also did a blood analysis for blood cell counts and electrolytes....to sum it up, the red blood cell counts are down so the booster has yet to "kick in"...the electrolytes are OK.....this is why she is not having much in the "gas tank"......the nausea is being caused by the "cumulative effect" of the chemo and also most likely by the pain medication for the esophagitis.
Tomorrow after radiation (day 25), we go back for more hydration, etc. My mind is a bit more at ease as I felt a bit hopeless over one night..having to look at a whole weekend of possible trouble was something I was really concerned about.
Linda is in much better shape as I write this....the esophagitis still hurts..it still is painful to eat..but physically...and mentally, she is in much better shape...not the best but better. Having to physically and mentally endure all this treatment is taking it's toll.
More later.
Dave
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
Wednesday Late...September 12th
Not a good evening for Linda..after nausea all day along with the esophagitis...she lost to the nausea...which was made worse by the sore esophagus...so she is in bed for the night...and I am keeping a close watch on her. It was an awful day for her...I can only hope for a better day tomorrow.
I've been reading a book called The Four-Fold Way, Walking the Paths of the Warrior, Teacher, Healer and Visionary. It is about attending to the health of our "inner" and "outer" houses...that is, inside ourselves and the world we live in. It examines four archetypes (patterns of behavior) to live in harmony and balance with our envirnoment and inner selves. It draws on the teaching of ancient tribes for direction.
Anyway, a piece caught my eye tonight:
When I awake in the morning,
It is either the very next day
after many, many days.
Or it is the very first day.
Today is the first day
Of what exists now.
I catch myself growing weary of this cancer treatment and effects thereof...until I remind myself this is the path to the cure and each day is the "new normal". I also struggle with living in the future instead of being current.....the remedy is to stop and notice and bring myself back to the present. This is the best supporter I can be.
Dave
ps.....I'm also reading the Harry Potter books (why not?)....I'm just finishing the second book...wouldn't it be nice to just wave the magic wand and...and.....
I've been reading a book called The Four-Fold Way, Walking the Paths of the Warrior, Teacher, Healer and Visionary. It is about attending to the health of our "inner" and "outer" houses...that is, inside ourselves and the world we live in. It examines four archetypes (patterns of behavior) to live in harmony and balance with our envirnoment and inner selves. It draws on the teaching of ancient tribes for direction.
Anyway, a piece caught my eye tonight:
When I awake in the morning,
It is either the very next day
after many, many days.
Or it is the very first day.
Today is the first day
Of what exists now.
I catch myself growing weary of this cancer treatment and effects thereof...until I remind myself this is the path to the cure and each day is the "new normal". I also struggle with living in the future instead of being current.....the remedy is to stop and notice and bring myself back to the present. This is the best supporter I can be.
Dave
ps.....I'm also reading the Harry Potter books (why not?)....I'm just finishing the second book...wouldn't it be nice to just wave the magic wand and...and.....
Wednesday Afternoon....September 12th
23 days of Radiation done......12 to go.....MAYBE....
Not Such a Good Day.
Last night Linda was nauseated and feeling the esaphagitis......although she didn't throw up, her night was miserable. So of course, today doesn't look or feel well for her. We are trying to manage the above effects with the medications....with a mixed success.
Linda is now sleeping.....trying to make up for some of the loss from last night......she isn't eating enough today either so we have to deal with that when she wakes up...feeling better I hope.
So it was a "sorry sight" walking into radiation today. And today was the day to meet with the radiation oncologist.
To make this all the "short version"...the oncologist wasn't as concerned about the look of the patient but rather the "dose volume constraints" of the radiation...I won't go into an explanation of what that means in technical terms......V20....boost fields....35%....angle changes.... etc... etc..... because it was difficult for us to understand also. What we think we understand is that only so much radiation can be given according to the volume of the lungs and the radiation field, etc. In Linda's case, there are two concerns....first, the impact on the spinal cord...with that in mind, after 26 sessions (3 more), the angle of the field has to be changes to eliminate including the spinal cord in the field. The second concern is the size of the field and the amount of radiation. Supposedly, they will be recomputing everything after next Monday to find out how much more radiation can be given....the oncologist indicated this might mean a total of 33 sessions...or 34...as opposed to the maximum of 35. He just doesn't know at this point....I guess the computer does all the calculations and gives them the answer.
So we asked about the risk involved..with lower total of doses...and there could be an impact..how much..no idea.....his dilemma is, as he said earlier, to get rid of the cancer while keeping the normal cells healthy....remember, earlier, he had said that the cancer was the easy part in terms of radiation..it is taking care of the normal cells that presents the problem.
So I think I have explained it the best I can. At this point we are concerned...not scared...but it did impact us...along with the side symptoms. Our goal now its to get the side effects under control and to be as "healthy as one can be" for these next sessions.
This is not a picture day.....enough said about that.
Linda was impacted by a saying on the wall in her dressing room:
Courage doesn't always roar.....
Sometimes Courage is the quiet voice the the end of the day saying.....
"I will try again tomorrow"
Courage is not roaring today....Linda will try again tomorrow.....
Dave
Not Such a Good Day.
Last night Linda was nauseated and feeling the esaphagitis......although she didn't throw up, her night was miserable. So of course, today doesn't look or feel well for her. We are trying to manage the above effects with the medications....with a mixed success.
Linda is now sleeping.....trying to make up for some of the loss from last night......she isn't eating enough today either so we have to deal with that when she wakes up...feeling better I hope.
So it was a "sorry sight" walking into radiation today. And today was the day to meet with the radiation oncologist.
To make this all the "short version"...the oncologist wasn't as concerned about the look of the patient but rather the "dose volume constraints" of the radiation...I won't go into an explanation of what that means in technical terms......V20....boost fields....35%....angle changes.... etc... etc..... because it was difficult for us to understand also. What we think we understand is that only so much radiation can be given according to the volume of the lungs and the radiation field, etc. In Linda's case, there are two concerns....first, the impact on the spinal cord...with that in mind, after 26 sessions (3 more), the angle of the field has to be changes to eliminate including the spinal cord in the field. The second concern is the size of the field and the amount of radiation. Supposedly, they will be recomputing everything after next Monday to find out how much more radiation can be given....the oncologist indicated this might mean a total of 33 sessions...or 34...as opposed to the maximum of 35. He just doesn't know at this point....I guess the computer does all the calculations and gives them the answer.
So we asked about the risk involved..with lower total of doses...and there could be an impact..how much..no idea.....his dilemma is, as he said earlier, to get rid of the cancer while keeping the normal cells healthy....remember, earlier, he had said that the cancer was the easy part in terms of radiation..it is taking care of the normal cells that presents the problem.
So I think I have explained it the best I can. At this point we are concerned...not scared...but it did impact us...along with the side symptoms. Our goal now its to get the side effects under control and to be as "healthy as one can be" for these next sessions.
This is not a picture day.....enough said about that.
Linda was impacted by a saying on the wall in her dressing room:
Courage doesn't always roar.....
Sometimes Courage is the quiet voice the the end of the day saying.....
"I will try again tomorrow"
Courage is not roaring today....Linda will try again tomorrow.....
Dave
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Tuesday Afternoon...September 11th
Radiation day 22...13 to go. Chemo cycle 2 completed
Today Linda completed her 22nd day of radiation..she was late coming out as she was found in a room waiting for the radiation oncologist...to which she was reminded it was tomorrow!. Duh..chemo brain!
Linda went over to the infusion center at the clinic..not for another dose of chemo but rather some additional hydration because of her "drama" yesterday..and they are "buffing" and "fluffing" her up for her upcoming Mexico trip to see Jim and Jenn get married. Linda also got a booster shot for red cell production. All in all, she is weathering this well. Fatigued and tired...and a sore esophagus....they have given her some additional pain medication for the esophagitis which is in liquid form....
Linda ran into another patient who had terminal pancreatic cancer...it put things into perspective for Linda in terms of feeling sorry for herself....as she said:.."things could be worse"
It reminded me of a race car driver who lost his legs in a racing accident. His name is Alex Zanardi...who happens to be Linda's favorite race car driver of all times (Jimmy Vasser running a close second)...I will find a picture or two of Alex and Linda together when I have time and post them.
Anyway Alex wrote a book about his racing experiences including his accident where he lost his legs. A very striking and impacting reference in the book has to do with Alex opening the door in the hospital and a man in a wheel chair was coming through from the other direction. The man asked Alex for his autograph...and Alex asked him how he was doing. The man said he was alright and then added: ""You're lucky to have some of your legs left so you can walk at least ,whereas I don't and will have to be in a wheelchair forever". Alex found this put things into perspective for him in his road to recovery and a positive life.
Again, a very powerful reminder and message for both of us....
In Wings, they talk about every event being "neutral"...it's what you do with or as a result of the event that will be your experience.....isn't that what The Secret is really all about?
And today is September 11th.................
Dave
Today Linda completed her 22nd day of radiation..she was late coming out as she was found in a room waiting for the radiation oncologist...to which she was reminded it was tomorrow!. Duh..chemo brain!
Linda went over to the infusion center at the clinic..not for another dose of chemo but rather some additional hydration because of her "drama" yesterday..and they are "buffing" and "fluffing" her up for her upcoming Mexico trip to see Jim and Jenn get married. Linda also got a booster shot for red cell production. All in all, she is weathering this well. Fatigued and tired...and a sore esophagus....they have given her some additional pain medication for the esophagitis which is in liquid form....
Linda ran into another patient who had terminal pancreatic cancer...it put things into perspective for Linda in terms of feeling sorry for herself....as she said:.."things could be worse"
It reminded me of a race car driver who lost his legs in a racing accident. His name is Alex Zanardi...who happens to be Linda's favorite race car driver of all times (Jimmy Vasser running a close second)...I will find a picture or two of Alex and Linda together when I have time and post them.
Anyway Alex wrote a book about his racing experiences including his accident where he lost his legs. A very striking and impacting reference in the book has to do with Alex opening the door in the hospital and a man in a wheel chair was coming through from the other direction. The man asked Alex for his autograph...and Alex asked him how he was doing. The man said he was alright and then added: ""You're lucky to have some of your legs left so you can walk at least ,whereas I don't and will have to be in a wheelchair forever". Alex found this put things into perspective for him in his road to recovery and a positive life.
Again, a very powerful reminder and message for both of us....
In Wings, they talk about every event being "neutral"...it's what you do with or as a result of the event that will be your experience.....isn't that what The Secret is really all about?
And today is September 11th.................
Dave
Monday, September 10, 2007
Monday Evening..September 10th
21 days of radiation done (14 to go)....6th day of chemo..end of cycle 2....(Four 21 day cycles to go later on)
A DAY OF DRAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Linda started the day in radiation...she meets with the radiation oncologist Wednesday to go over the remapping for the remainder of the treatments (12 of them).
We then went over to finish the second cycle of chemo (the 6th day)....it was to be a long one because of the hydration required with this last day of chemo. On Mondays, Linda meets with the medical oncologist or nurse practitioner and does a blood test to make sure the counts are up and her kidneys are working well.
And then..........................................
As the blood draw was in progress, Linda fainted....which caused a mad rush for the nurse practitioner and some help.....Linda came back around.....
And then..........................................
She passed out again. A mad scramble for oxygen, legs and arms flying in the small room getting her up on a table on her back......a quick infusion of liquids.....this time she really "went out"....a scare for eveyone involved.
Once Linda was stabilized, it was found that her blood pressure was quite low as was her pulse (46 beats per minute!). It didn't take take much time once the fluids were in her body that she regained her color...blood pressure and good pulse.
While this was going on, her blood was being analyzed and things looked pretty good in terms of the blood. The decision was made to move forward with the chemo with the additional hydration on top of the intial infusion....and she is to come back tomorrow for additional hydration. They also are giving her a booster shot tomorrow for the production of red blood cells.
Things did get scary...but at the end , Linda did well with the chemo. She is now totally off the blood pressure medicines also until all of this is done.....
Linda did chemo today lying down
Today was son Jeff's birthday....Linda had no energy to bake a cake as she would be prone to do....but we bought a really cool frosting loaded one....Jeff was working at the pub today and we could tell going out the door that the patrons were going to get into that cake pretty fast.
Enough excitement for the day! Linda keeps thinking about how "good" she looks when she is out with people and then stuff like today happens....she says: "who is going to believe us?".......I tell her: "Remember cancer is like a roller coaster...some days are good and others aren't".
Dave
A DAY OF DRAMA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Linda started the day in radiation...she meets with the radiation oncologist Wednesday to go over the remapping for the remainder of the treatments (12 of them).
We then went over to finish the second cycle of chemo (the 6th day)....it was to be a long one because of the hydration required with this last day of chemo. On Mondays, Linda meets with the medical oncologist or nurse practitioner and does a blood test to make sure the counts are up and her kidneys are working well.
And then..........................................
As the blood draw was in progress, Linda fainted....which caused a mad rush for the nurse practitioner and some help.....Linda came back around.....
And then..........................................
She passed out again. A mad scramble for oxygen, legs and arms flying in the small room getting her up on a table on her back......a quick infusion of liquids.....this time she really "went out"....a scare for eveyone involved.
Once Linda was stabilized, it was found that her blood pressure was quite low as was her pulse (46 beats per minute!). It didn't take take much time once the fluids were in her body that she regained her color...blood pressure and good pulse.
While this was going on, her blood was being analyzed and things looked pretty good in terms of the blood. The decision was made to move forward with the chemo with the additional hydration on top of the intial infusion....and she is to come back tomorrow for additional hydration. They also are giving her a booster shot tomorrow for the production of red blood cells.
Things did get scary...but at the end , Linda did well with the chemo. She is now totally off the blood pressure medicines also until all of this is done.....
Linda did chemo today lying down
Today was son Jeff's birthday....Linda had no energy to bake a cake as she would be prone to do....but we bought a really cool frosting loaded one....Jeff was working at the pub today and we could tell going out the door that the patrons were going to get into that cake pretty fast.
Enough excitement for the day! Linda keeps thinking about how "good" she looks when she is out with people and then stuff like today happens....she says: "who is going to believe us?".......I tell her: "Remember cancer is like a roller coaster...some days are good and others aren't".
Dave
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Sunday Night...September 9th
Tomorrow..day 21 of radiation (out of 35)...and day 6 of chemo (out of 6..cycle 2)
One of the side effects of cancer is fatigue..much different than being tired....a cancer patient has to be acutely aware of energy accumulation (through rest, diet, attitude and exercise) and energy spent....it's been explained to us like a bank account with deposits made and expenditures made.....and one cannot spend more than deposited in the account (unless you are one of the previous "buyers" of our pub who in a new pub business cashed 290 checks for $500,000 he didn't have....and you guessed right..he's in jail as we speak).
Anyway, the reason for this review (with the side shot at the pub buyer who was in on doing us in for $200,000) is that Linda spent a lot of energy yesterday ..beyond that that she had accumulated....so today was tough for her.....the esophagitis continues to create the "flamethrower" in her chest......she is incredibly amazed at how this in an instant disappeared last night at the picnic..she wants to find that formula again.
While looking over the Portland area for land and houses, Linda was able to get some naps in and slept all the way home.
Tomorrow we meet with the nurse practitioner and hope to continue the search for a solution to the esophagitis...we also pray that the white cell count is such that there is no interruption of the radiation sessions.
Dave
One of the side effects of cancer is fatigue..much different than being tired....a cancer patient has to be acutely aware of energy accumulation (through rest, diet, attitude and exercise) and energy spent....it's been explained to us like a bank account with deposits made and expenditures made.....and one cannot spend more than deposited in the account (unless you are one of the previous "buyers" of our pub who in a new pub business cashed 290 checks for $500,000 he didn't have....and you guessed right..he's in jail as we speak).
Anyway, the reason for this review (with the side shot at the pub buyer who was in on doing us in for $200,000) is that Linda spent a lot of energy yesterday ..beyond that that she had accumulated....so today was tough for her.....the esophagitis continues to create the "flamethrower" in her chest......she is incredibly amazed at how this in an instant disappeared last night at the picnic..she wants to find that formula again.
While looking over the Portland area for land and houses, Linda was able to get some naps in and slept all the way home.
Tomorrow we meet with the nurse practitioner and hope to continue the search for a solution to the esophagitis...we also pray that the white cell count is such that there is no interruption of the radiation sessions.
Dave
Saturday, September 8, 2007
Saturday Evening ......September 8th
Day 5 of 6 for chemo...last day Monday (of the second cycle)...Monday will be day 21 of 35 for radiation...
Today was a pretty good day for Linda....after a rare Saturday chemo session, we headed to Portland to look at some possible properties and to attend a picnic for Oregon Education Association staff retirees.
Linda suffered most of the day (and the previous night) with the esophagitis.....and a headache. What was miraculous was that when Linda got to the picnic and saw old acquaintances and friends...it was as if every problem disappeared for the moment..she even ate good! I think people expected Linda to be a "shadow" of what she looked like tonight..but her positive attitude and love and openess for people showed as a glow in her tonight....she was energized!
It was good to see some good, good people we hadn't seen in a long time.....we hope they stop by the house from time to time to spread more of whatever it was that energized Linda tonight.
We looked for a property and/or a house south of Portland this afternoon..not much available out there. Tomorrow we are going to look in southern Washington along the river and then some additional properties south of Portland.
Dave
Friday, September 7, 2007
Friday Evening, Sept. 7, 2007
Dave asked me to post again for the second time this week. I'm beginning to think he may be falling down on the job!
It's been a wearing week doing both the chemo and radiation, but I'm glad to have it almost behind me. All the nurses and aides at the chemo center are wonderful and so supportive that I actually miss them when I don't have chemo.
I actually had a Cat Scan this morning rather that x-rays, but I don't have the results yet. If there is a significant enough reduction in the tumor, they will do a new template the middle of next week. I sure pray there is. My oncologist was gone, so I met with his partner, but she really didn't have much to say.
The esophigitis has been bothering me more than ever (probably because of the chemo and radiation together this week), so they are increasing my dose of Prevacid again. I got very little sleep last night because of the pain of it. I think I'll take extra sleeping aids tonight to see if I can get more sleep. We have an 8:00am chemo in the morning and plan to drive to the valley afterwards, so I want a good rest tonight. I realize the trip will probably be draining on me, but I know the distraction of visiting with friends and family really helps.
Thanks again for all your comments. They are all so beautiful and bring tears to my eyes.
Love and gratitude......Linda
It's been a wearing week doing both the chemo and radiation, but I'm glad to have it almost behind me. All the nurses and aides at the chemo center are wonderful and so supportive that I actually miss them when I don't have chemo.
I actually had a Cat Scan this morning rather that x-rays, but I don't have the results yet. If there is a significant enough reduction in the tumor, they will do a new template the middle of next week. I sure pray there is. My oncologist was gone, so I met with his partner, but she really didn't have much to say.
The esophigitis has been bothering me more than ever (probably because of the chemo and radiation together this week), so they are increasing my dose of Prevacid again. I got very little sleep last night because of the pain of it. I think I'll take extra sleeping aids tonight to see if I can get more sleep. We have an 8:00am chemo in the morning and plan to drive to the valley afterwards, so I want a good rest tonight. I realize the trip will probably be draining on me, but I know the distraction of visiting with friends and family really helps.
Thanks again for all your comments. They are all so beautiful and bring tears to my eyes.
Love and gratitude......Linda
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Thursday Night....September 6th
Day 19 of Radiation (16 to go)....Day 3 of Chemo (3 to go)
Linda actually weathered the day fairly well. Her radiation session included news that she will be xrayed and remapped tomorrow....followed by the Friday meeting with the radialogy oncologist....so we'll know how things are progressing at that time.
Linda slept through most all of the chemo infusion today....two days in a row..this is new behavior for whatever reason.....can't hurt for sure.
The side effects continue to be minimal (as opposed to the first cycle)....Linda's pulse rate was up today...and then she remembered she hadn't taken her heart medication which lowers the rate....a quick fix to that! I've been keeping an eye on the cancer treatment medications....now I am watching the normal long term medications like the hormones and heart prescriptions too.
Linda's high school friend Claudia came by today and spent the afternoon....she was a great support (and has been).....Linda hopes to see her more.
Bottom line...Linda is weathering this portion of the treatment well....still some side effects like the headache...esophagitis...hair loss....weak...but avoiding some unpleasant side effects that came up in the first round...
As we discussed this evening......these are side effects deliberately brought about by a process deliberately induced to cure her of cancer.....
Dave
Linda actually weathered the day fairly well. Her radiation session included news that she will be xrayed and remapped tomorrow....followed by the Friday meeting with the radialogy oncologist....so we'll know how things are progressing at that time.
Linda slept through most all of the chemo infusion today....two days in a row..this is new behavior for whatever reason.....can't hurt for sure.
The side effects continue to be minimal (as opposed to the first cycle)....Linda's pulse rate was up today...and then she remembered she hadn't taken her heart medication which lowers the rate....a quick fix to that! I've been keeping an eye on the cancer treatment medications....now I am watching the normal long term medications like the hormones and heart prescriptions too.
Linda's high school friend Claudia came by today and spent the afternoon....she was a great support (and has been).....Linda hopes to see her more.
Bottom line...Linda is weathering this portion of the treatment well....still some side effects like the headache...esophagitis...hair loss....weak...but avoiding some unpleasant side effects that came up in the first round...
As we discussed this evening......these are side effects deliberately brought about by a process deliberately induced to cure her of cancer.....
Dave
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Wednesday Evening.....September 5th
Day 18 of 35 Radiation ("Hump Day")....Day 2 of 6 Cycle 2 of Chemo .......
Linda did her second day of chemo per the above..slept most of the session..this is the first time she's done that...we think it is because of the medication she is taking for the nausea prevention...which...by the way...is working! We have learned how to "get ahead of the side effects" rather than "chase the side effects" as we were doing in Cycle 1. Each person experiences the chemicals differently and it takes a round to figure it out.
Linda has been a bit unsteady on her feet today...possibly again because of the medication and/or the number of radiation sessions compounded by the second cycle of chemo.
We have been meeting a lot of different cancer patients..each has a different story and a different cancer..it is most incredible to experience the vast kinds of cancers (knowing there are even more) and how each human being is doing his/her "journey". This is a "world within a world"..."a world of it's own".......hard for "normal " folks to understand...one's "priorities" and "needs" are all rearranged....each one is doing it "uniquely" and with "strength" and "dignity"......enough said......
Dave
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Tuesday Early Evening....September 4th
A Big Day Today......
Linda started this day with a lot of apprehension...she felt like things weren't right ....and that everything would be postponed.....
Linda did her 17th day of radiation first....not much to report...things went well...her cough is attributed to the smoke in the Sisters area from the big fire..so back on the cough syrup she goes...
Today Linda met with the Medical Oncologist for the first time since the beginning of things....she was nervous about what he would say....and he said everything was going well and she was progressing well. He spent quite a bit of time explaining what they were trying to do and that it was a very agressive treatment and he thought she was weathering it well...he indicated he didn't want to back off as this was her best shot at a cure. He also explained about the 21 day treatment cycles after the radiation was completed and felt at this point that she could begin those cycles 2 weeks after radiation was completed. He did expect her to be neutropenic again...our hope is that it does not delay any more radiation sessions.
The Oncologist then sent Linda in for her chemo ...and indicated he would run in and stop things if her blood test results weren't good.....to make a long story short..the blood was just fine....so Linda did the double dose of chemicals with hydration in between..a long day which she weathered well....she does a single chemical (VP 16) tomorrow through Saturday (yes..now Saturday) and finishes next Monday with another long day of double chemicals...
Son Jeff came by and spent time with his Mom....See two smiling faces below..
.
The Oncologist said he was going to come up with a bumper sticker for Linda's car...letting folks know she is a "model patient"
Dave
Monday, September 3, 2007
Monday Evening....September 3rd
It's time I check in as it has been awhile since I posted. I should let Dave have a day off once in a while.
I had a good night's sleep last night and woke up feeling a little more positive today. Starting the day off good is important to me. My emotions were all over the place yesterday. I actually don't know why some days are more emotional than others. I've just learned to accept it and work harder on those days to keep a positive attitute. I know it's important for me to feel my feelings rather than bury them, so sometimes, I just let the tears fall. It's not all sadness, though. Sometimes, the gratitude I have for all my love and support brings me to tears. I just seem to "feel" more deeply than ever before.
Dave took me for a drive up the mountain today to watch the fire. It's over 5300 acres now and they evacuated Black Butte Resort of over 1200 homes at 2:30 today.
Thanks again for all the cards, emails, comments and gifts that you have sent.
Love and Gratitude
Linda
I had a good night's sleep last night and woke up feeling a little more positive today. Starting the day off good is important to me. My emotions were all over the place yesterday. I actually don't know why some days are more emotional than others. I've just learned to accept it and work harder on those days to keep a positive attitute. I know it's important for me to feel my feelings rather than bury them, so sometimes, I just let the tears fall. It's not all sadness, though. Sometimes, the gratitude I have for all my love and support brings me to tears. I just seem to "feel" more deeply than ever before.
Dave took me for a drive up the mountain today to watch the fire. It's over 5300 acres now and they evacuated Black Butte Resort of over 1200 homes at 2:30 today.
Thanks again for all the cards, emails, comments and gifts that you have sent.
Love and Gratitude
Linda
Sunday, September 2, 2007
Sunday Evening...September 2nd
Not much new to report....Linda's about the same as yesterday....the fire west of us grew to 3200 acres but not much closer our direction.... http://www.blackbutteranch.com/fire/We have spent the day watching car races...and more car races....and...and a short walk...that's about it....oh....Linda did 10 minutes on the tred mill (good for her!)
Dave
Saturday, September 1, 2007
Saturday Evening..September 1st
Well..here's the "bald lady"...Son Jim stopped by to visit so I got a picture of the two of them....I was reminded that this weekend has been our NASCAR in Fontana, California (California 500)for years....I'm sure glad we didn't try to make it as the temperature was 105 degrees on the track today...we do miss old friends there though...maybe next year....
Linda did ok today..she feels "sick" but can't describe it as it isn't any sick feeling she's had before.....the headache has gone away...the esophagitis is still there along with the acid reflux..so soup for her today.....maybe by Monday she'll feel "up".
The fire west of us burned hot today .....it is at 1200 acres but no evacuations of the major resort, Black Butte Ranch yet..it is in a state of preparedness though.....fire retardent airplanes flew over our house all day long....
Dave
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